So as I was getting this old blog back up and running, I stumbled upon this post I started writing shortly after Fo4 was born. I wasn't sure at the time about sharing it and actually stopped writing. I'm going to finish this post now and share it with you as I celebrate today the birth of my beautiful baby boy!
(Written in mid February of 2013) Three weeks ago Forrest and I welcomed the newest member of our family, our sweet baby boy, Forrest, IV. It is hard to believe how much he has grown and changed in such a short period of time. It is also incredible how much love I have for this little person for whom I prayed and waited for months and months but have only known for 23 days.
I want to share my birth experience. This will not be a gruesome tale full of unwanted details that make people uncomfortable. I believe it is a beautiful story of new life and the making of a family. I'm not going to leave anything important out, but if you are thinking of having a baby or are expecting your first little loved one, I encourage you to read my story. When I was pregnant I read a lovely book, "Ina Mae's Guide to Childbirth." This book included dozens of birth stories, some uplifting and awe-inspiring and some of more difficult births. As I read I was encouraged by the stories these women shared about their labor and birth experiences. I really think that our society has given us a distorted view of labor and birth and I want to add my story to those of women who had incredible birth experiences so that more women might feel empowered to face childbirth without fear.
I believe that each woman has the right to choose certain factors that will influence her birth experience--from where she will deliver, to the person who will deliver her baby to the type of pain management she will choose. The following is the story of the birth of my sweet baby boy.
Labor Begins
The Monday that I went into labor I felt my first contraction while I was at work at 2:30pm. I was on a conference call in the last few minutes before I headed out of the office for an ultrasound. I was measuring 37cm, so the Dr.'s wanted to check out the baby's weight to see if he was measuring small as well. Forrest and I met at the practice and saw very little of our sweet boy as he was already very low. His weight was in the 50% percentile and I joked that maybe all the poking and prodding from the ultrasound would encourage him to make his move by the end of the day! I went home and it was a cold, but beautiful January day, so I headed out for a walk. I normally walked for about 45 minutes to an hour, but I was having so much discomfort in my hips and back I was only able to walk for about 25 minutes.
When I returned to the house I got dinner ready -- baked potatoes with broccoli, cheese and fat free greek yogurt -- and started setting out the snacks for our small group that was meeting at our house at 7pm. Forrest and I sat down to dinner at 5:30ish and I felt another contraction. I told Forrest about it and we decided to time the distance between this one and the next. 30 minutes later I had the second contraction. I was busy making guacamole as our small group arrived and stopped timing the contractions. Throughout our meeting I felt rush after rush and knew they were getting closer together, but I wasn't in much pain, so I figured I still had hours and hours left of early labor before I would even need to go to the hospital.
Everyone headed out around 8:30pm so we decided to start timing contractions again to see how far apart they were. Forrest downloaded an App -- I don't remember the name of it -- on the iPad to help us keep track of them all. By 9:30pm my contractions were 7 minutes apart and about 30 to 45 seconds long. The contractions were uncomfortable, but I was still not in pain. We called our families to let them know that regular contractions had started. My mom and sister were driving in from my hometown about 3 and 1/2 hours away and I wanted to give them time to get ready in case this was the real thing (despite all the signs, I wasn't sure if I was in labor for real because while I was uncomfortable I was not in pain).
At 10:30 or 11:00pm my mom called and said they were on their way. We kept timing the contractions and by 11:30pm they were about 5 minutes apart and 50 to 60 seconds in duration. I called the doctor and she said for me to wait another hour and keep timing them. She said that if they stayed the same or got closer together then to call her on my way to the hospital to let her know I was en route. I decided that we were probably going to have a long night ahead of us, so I went upstairs and took a hot shower and shaved my legs. At this point my contractions were less than 4 minutes apart and lasting about a minute. Who shaves their legs at this point in the labor process? Again -- I had hard time believing I was in labor since I was feeling no pain.
Arriving at the Hospital
We arrived at the hospital around 1:00am. We pulled up to the Emergency Room entrance, but I told Forrest to park the car and we would walk in together. They put me in a wheelchair and I was strolled up to Labor and Delivery. They set me up with a fetal monitor to hear the baby's heartbeat and to measure my contractions. I was getting more uncomfortable, but I was still worried they would send me home because I wasn't sure if I was in active labor yet. When the Dr. did her assessment I was 4cm dilated and fully effaced...so I was admitted and taken to my delivery room. By the time I got checked into my room, my mom and sister had arrived. They came in and spent some time with Forrest and me.
I wasn't allowed to eat anything but water and ice chips, but it was the middle of the night and I wasn't really hungry anymore anyways. I walked around the hall several times, but the contractions were starting to get more uncomfortable, so I decided to stay in the room and move around in there instead of out on the hall. I had packed this bag full of books, cards, music, washcloths, suckers, etc. and I really wanted to use something in there. I asked my mom and sister to take out the Tina Fey book, "Bossypants" and read to me as I leaned on Forrest and he held my hand through the contractions. I had them read me the chapter on her experience at UVA. Forrest, Rebekah and I really enjoyed this as we are all W&M alums and Fey was not too fond of her experience at the University (there is a bit of a family rivalry as both Forrest and my younger sisters attended UVA).
Mom and Reba ran out to get breakfast -- it was around 4:30am at this point -- and the contractions were starting to get more intense. The nurse was really helpful in suggesting different positions to manage the discomfort and pain from the contractions (they were starting to finally be painful - I was now 7 to 8cms dilated). I sat on the swiss ball (they call it a birthing ball -- but all it is is a swiss ball), I stood and leaned on Forrest, I laid on my side in the bed, I sat on the ball and laid my head on the bed, and I knelt on the bed and wrapped my arms around Forrest's neck for support. I never really stayed in one position for more than 5 contractions because they started to become too painful.
I asked the nurse how much worse the pain was going to get because I was starting to think that I might want an epidural if it was going to get any worse than this! The nurse was amazing -- she had obviously read my birth plan and wanted to help me stick to it -- and encouraged me to see how the next few contractions felt before I decided. The next few contractions were a little easier, so I decided not to get the epidural. Mom and Reba stopped back in around 5:30am and brought Forrest breakfast -- an everything bagel (seriously!?). He stepped out to eat and they came in and held my hand. At this point I was in quite a bit of pain with each contraction. I would close my eyes and breathe. I was very focused during each rush and that helped me to manage the pain from a place within myself.
When Forrest came back in we were about 9cms and things started to really pick up.
This is For Real
(this is where we pick back up on 1/21/14) I think I must have gotten to this part and tried to decide just what I would share about the next part of labor. And after a year of mulling this over I think I know what to write.
The next hour of labor was really tough. It was time to push and I'll be honest and say that it took me a while to figure out exactly how to push and start making progress. At some point the nurses changed as did the doctor - I think this happened right before I started pushing - but I was so focused on finding strength within myself and there was no change in the level of care I received, so I don't really remember much about it other than that it happened.
After about an hour and a half of pushing I heard the nurse make a call and say that they were going to deliver a baby in about 2 to 3 minutes. After 15 hours of labor I could most certainly make it 3 more minutes. It was go time.
Forrest and the nurse were cheering for and encouraging me with each set of pushes. I remember feeling so connected to my husband during that time. Knowing we were in this together gave me so much strength. And finally - at 8:39am on his due date - my little man arrived. I was so focused on pushing that the three of them were all like "MEGAN - LOOK HE'S HERE!" (I think I kept my eyes closed most of the time once I reached 9 cm.)
We become three
There are not words to describe the emotions I felt when I saw that beautiful face. I know that God's creation and great design are evident all around me, but when I saw that face I think I truly understood just what a perfect creator God is. He had a head full of hair and these big dark eyes. His ears and nose and lips were so perfect. He had long fingers and toes - like his daddy - and he was absolute perfection.
What a year it has been for our little family of three, filled with many sleepless nights, much fear and self-doubt...but mostly overflowing joy.
